Recently I read the book The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up by Marie Kondo, which I think I must have seen first on YouTube in a video about wardrobe editing. It made me realize that I was down with the idea of downsizing my possessions and surrounding myself only with the things that “spark joy” (Kondo’s catch phrase of the book.)
I came upon the idea independently when I was doing laundry one day. All of my clean clothes still in baskets, I looked at what was hanging in my closet and was unhappy with what I saw there. I realized that everything I had been wearing this season was in the baskets behind me, and even with the winter clothing pushed to the back of the closet, what was left were things that were wearing out or didn’t suit me in one way or another. I grabbed an armful and hung them up on the opposite side of the room where I hang my absurd collection of black dresses. Then when I hung up my laundry, what I saw in the closet made me happy. I’m not one to simplify emotions like that too often, but strictly comparing what I felt before and after removing those neglected clothes, the difference was clear. The absence of guilt and disappointment at not wanting to wear what I own I’m going to call “happiness.” So I started reading.
The KonMari method involves tidying by category, first discarding everything you don’t love, then assigning a home for everything that remains. Tidying by category means that you gather all of the items in one category, first is clothing, so from every coat closet, drawer, laundry basket or back of chair that you might find clothing, you gather everything into a pile. I was naughty and left things hanging up in consideration for space.
I did take my black dresses down from their rack, you can see them at the bottom of the image on white hangers. I piled things roughly by category, pants, tops, seasonal wear, casual or sleep things. Also I left my under things in their drawers until this mess was taken care of.
These are the two giant bags I donated. See that pink homecoming dress? That’s one of my regretful items. Maybe if Michelle still has the bag, I’ll rescue it. If not, that’s no big deal either. I did let my sister go through the discard bags, which Kondo strongly discourages. I don’t think she ended up keeping much of what she pulled out of there, there really were good reasons to get rid of most of it, and only a few were strictly because they didn’t bring me joy. Marie Kondo stresses the importance of letting go of the items you find difficult to decide whether or not to keep. If you feel indecisive then there’s likely something about it that is giving you a negative feeling, which you should be happy to let go of.
Another focus of the book is vertical storage. What you keep should be arranged in a method that’s easy to put things away, and makes it easy to select a particular item. This means not stacking items on top of each other. Imagine how it feels to be the bottom item in a pile, Kondo says. She suggests you wouldn’t be very happy. In the clothing category this means folding (and she does stress the benefits of folding over hanging) clothes in such a way that they stand up vertically so that they line up like books in a bookshelf, each one visible and accessible for your selection. I did not understand this concept until I watched a few YouTube videos. How can floppy fabric stand up on its own?
Once I sat down and started folding, it became easier to find the “sweet spot” where an item will stand up on its own. The idea is that when you remove an item to wear it the rest stay where they are and don’t topple down on top of each other.
With a reduced volume of things to start with, I found it easy to fit everything in the drawers that I own. One for T-shirts and sleep things, one for Jean pants and shorts, one for sweaters, for socks and hosiery, underwear, bras and shape wear and eventually I added one for cardigans and layering items that I didn’t like hanging with the more structured items like pants jackets and dresses. It’s still going to look like I have a shit ton of clothes. Mostly because I kept most of my dresses even most of the black ones…
Another thing the downsizing allowed me to do was to purchase matching hangers and get rid of the damn colorful plastic ones that are the bane of my existence. During the process I had narrowed it down to just the blue and white hangers but the ivory velvet ones from Amazon really do look better. Here, have a before and after.
It feels pretty curated to me. There are things in there for specific occasions that may not come about very frequently but there isn’t anything that I will not wear and be happy about wearing.
Shoes (I use to need two of those cubbies) jewelry and purses followed, although these latter two weren’t such problem areas for me.
Books are next on Kondo’s category list. This wasn’t too difficult for me either. I kept my lifetime favorites like The Princess Bride, childhood favorites like The Great Good Thing and Harold’s Purple Crayon, some hobby related books and House of Leaves which I reread now and again and isn’t available (or practical) on kindle. Everything from college or my young adult days got donated.
Dear mother wouldn’t let me donate childhood toys, although I still think we could be more selective about which we save for the maybe grandchildren.
All of my artwork from college hit the curb. I realize now I should have taken pictures of some of it first, but it doesn’t give me any great regret. I kept some of my books from bookmaking class, which I think goes to show that I always liked making physical useful things rather than 2d or static artwork.
This purge coincided with a move so it was very convenient to only pack the things I really want to own and to discard or donate the rest. A lot of things came with me from my parents house without any curating at all so it was amazing to see all the crap that’s been in my basement these past couple of years. A move is a great time to do the home-assignment part of the KonMari method, because everything is in boxes and needs to be put away anyway, so if you do it with care and consideration for how you are going to be living with the objects you can put things away with purpose.
This was the most helpful with my cosmetics. Used to be everything was set out on top of my vanity, and while everything was accessible, it looked like a cluttered mess. Not to mention, powder and dust covers everything after a while and it’s a pain to clean everything that’s sitting out collecting it.
Now the only things left on the top of the vanity are the things it makes me happy to look at like my drag bunny or my marimo. Everything else I take out as needed and put away (in suddenly empty drawers due to the purge of ratty socks and underwear!) when I’m done. It’s been a couple of weeks and so far it’s really working for me.
Something else that’s different for me after reading has to do with daily routine. Kondo describes how when she gets home she takes off her shoes, takes the shoes from the previous day and her coat and handbag to her closet. Then she empties the contents of her purse into a tray. This is surely helpful if you switch to a different purse the next day, but she also says that it gives your bag time to rest. I noticed right away that if I left my purse-giant suitcase that it is-overstuffed too long it started putting creases in the leather. Now I’m letting it rest.
The last thing I want to mention about this book is that Kondo speaks a fair amount about the Shinto faith. I’m not a spiritual person, but I watched Toy Story and the Brave Little Toaster and I anthropomorphize my belongings sometimes. Kondo gives solid advice about letting go of things. She says if you paid a lot of money for something that you never used, instead of keeping it out of guilt you thank it for the thrill it brought you when you bought it, or you thank it for teaching you what doesn’t work for you. If something used to spark joy but doesn’t anymore, you simply tell it thank you for all it’s done for you and send it off on its journey like a celebration, in hopes that it can bring someone else joy. This resonated with me. Kondo relates her clients’ astounding testimonials about experiencing weight loss and grand fortunes as a result of using her method. It helped me get a fresh start.
Next in line for tidying is my crafting supplies. Let me know if you want an update on how I put my craft stash in order!
Dress-up For Life 